One thing we empaths seem to have in common is that we attract narcissists. In the past I would’ve said that attracting and keeping the narcissistic, manipulative, emotionally draining people in my life wasn’t intentional, but I’m not sure how true that really was.

October is my shadow work month where I get really f**king real with myself, so I’m going to share a little reflection with you. Sometimes us empaths attract the people who are absolutely nothing like us or find them to be mildly or extremely attractive because they have character traits we’re missing.

Narcissists are disgustingly charming.

We know it. We hate it. BUT let’s just pause for a moment and think about where they get the charm from. They aren’t pushovers. They exude a ridiculous amount of confidence and charisma. Depending on where they are on the NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) spectrum and if they’re not completely lost in their grandiosity, they can be incredibly intelligent and apply their intellect to get nearly anything they want. Their level of confidence and the strength of the boundaries they set can be admirable to an empath.

We’re so used to being open that we rarely balance our openness to others with time for ourselves (and everyone’s balance is different, by the way. That’s realized as you learn more about yourself). And let’s not forget that the reason why narcissists can be attracted to you isn’t all about empaths being “an easy target” because your sensitivity and compassion seem easy to exploit to them, but it’s also because they know they’re missing that ability to connect with others genuinely and are so incredibly shallow once their farce of a persona is exposed.

However, there is no need for us to succumb to the cycle of being seduced and then escaping the narcissist over and over again. We need to recognize the areas in our life that are lacking sufficient boundaries. Empaths have trouble with boundaries due to the fact that we’re so naturally open and have a natural insight that is praised by others, so why would we shut that down? Dare I say, we may hide a the part of ourselves where our insightful abilities can be used to pry into the inner truths of others and manipulate them as we wish. But we’re not “bad” people because we do that…right? We’re not like the narcissists who manipulate people and ignore their conscience deliberately…Well…if we’re invading the emotional or psychic boundaries of others are we any different?

I’m not trying to guilt trip you, I promise. I believe Deborah has the same intention not to guilt trip anyone, but to address that common and vicious cycle of the empath-narcissist dichotomy.

Deborah, aka The Peculiar Daughter on YouTube, discusses her own shadow self, how it’s linked to her empath ability, how being an empath attracted narcissistic people, and how she put an end to that. Comment below what you think. I think there are many of us who go through this and perpetuate their pain rather than pursue their power. I admit that I’m one of them and am grateful for Deborah’s insights.


More Metaphysical and Occult Topics

Why Would Empathy Make Me Psychic?

Are You Obsessing Over Your Twin Flame? Please Stop…

Rune Magic: The Runic Book of Days

6 Ways To Cleanse and Empower Yourself


You Belong To Yourself (3 of Cups reversed energy) -[Mystic Meditations]

Do you ever catch yourself trying to gain the approval of others? I consider that to be a bad habit of mine. There’s nothing I need to prove and trying to make people understand where I’m coming from can be such a drag. I feel like I’m surrounded by people who don’t try to get […]

bird sitting on stone cross of grave on sunny day

Autumn Post Challenge – Day 9 – I don’t have children… – [Just Me]

Prompt via The Life of Dee: Autumnal crafts for toddlers – give us ideas on what our little ones could make this season. I don’t have children. I’m not crafty. I wasn’t even allowed to do autumn crafts because when you’re raised by Christian parents, they think everything is a gateway to Satan. So I […]

photo of a full moon

Moondays Should Be Mindful – [Just Me]

It’s so important to have just one day completely stress free, but that’s not easy…like ever. Considering that many of us have been “grinding” so to speak either in the workforce or in school most of our lives, we can’t just say, “I’m relaxing now,” and boom! You’re chill AF. That’s not life. That’s not […]

Sorry to tell you this, but you don’t know psychics as well as you think. You’ve seen plenty of movies and shows about psychic people and their misadventures, but if all you know about psychic phenomena is from watching that stuff, you’re still in the dark. 

Psychic abilities aren’t just visions, dreams, talking to spirits, and self-pity. It’s an intense experience calling out to all in very subtle ways. Perhaps these less-discussed traits of psychic abilities aren’t cool enough for Hollywood, but I think it’s important for us to know what really goes on in the life of a psychic. Let’s go over the famous “clair-” abilities. 

Clairvoyance

What everyone thinks it is: seeing weird things pop up then disappear, zoning out, time traveling, a bad dream means something horrible is going to happen (especially if it keeps popping up), I see dead people and now everyone thinks I’m a freak. 

The technical definition: “Sometimes called ‘ESP,’ it is the psychic perception of objects, conditions, situations, or events invisible to most people, including auras, various health indicators, and spirits, as well as things at a distance in space or time,” (Weschke, Slate, 2016)

What clairvoyance really is:

  • The subconscious connecting to a future, past, or present event and linking the event to one’s sight
  • Visually recognizing the energy of an entity/spirit, which is often a vivid color, shadow, or light
  • Visually confirming the energetic presence of an entity/spirit or thing.
  • Seeing one’s environment without the constraints of time or barriers in the third dimensional plane

Read more here…