This is another one of those “just me” posts. I need to express something that is incredibly important. When it comes to manifesting the life you want, you don’t reach your full manifesting potential when you treat it like a part-time job. This is hard to admit because right now I’m torn between this job, which is blogging/writing/making music professionally and my current part-time where I work with those with autism and developmental disabilities. I absolutely love every client I work with and I learn something new from all of them. I’m really not the kind of person to half-ass a job or anything, really. With that being said, I’m noticing the majority of my energy is going into the part-time job leaving me with little energy after that shift to work on this job.
And when I try to express this to others, I often get asked “Well, why don’t you just work on your dream job on your days off or the weekends?” Because the energy needed for my dream job keeps going to the other job throughout the week and I deserve rest days (I know angst inspires art sometimes, but really…). In a perfect world, I can balance the dream job and the part-time with the same amount of energy. We don’t live in a perfect world, my dream job suffers, the part-time still takes demand. Through my own meditations, I have learned enough about pouring your energy into too many things and being left empty. The power to manifest requires having the power to persist and believe. Yes, my part-time job is helping me provide for things such as transportation and bills, but I know for a fact that if depression and strong suicidal ideation didn’t convince me my dream job wasn’t worth anything, I would be providing for myself. What I’m manifesting, I’ve done before. I’ve seen for myself that it works, but I’m letting things, like this job and other fears, pull me away.
Part-time dreaming doesn’t work. It may pay the bills and it may be one of the most wonderful jobs I’ve ever had, but it’s not the career path I’ve chosen for myself. If anything, I know my career can bring in so much abundance, that I will be able to invest in the progress of this current part-time job more than I have already. I want to donate and give to other charities to, like environmental protection. I want to make a living as the artist that I am and excel to a platform of philanthropy. I’m not going to be able to do that with a part-time attitude. My part-time dreaming is going to be a full-time reality.