Closer and closer to realizing my dreams as reality. Today is 11/11, a really special day with a very inspiring energy. I’m ravenous for creation, determined to publish and distribute my work. I truly feel like I’m finally going in the right direction and simultaneously knowing that going any direction will benefit me somehow.
This is a just a special time. Manifestation isn’t a joke or a fancy way of playing pretend and hoping all your dreams come true in a blink. It requires patience and emotional fortitude along with a strong belief in your developing work. To me, it’s a hunger and I am no longer starving. I am providing for myself each passing day.
I had a rough night, but such a peaceful morning because I remembered that I’m free to live how I want thanks to this hunger and the development of my own self-trust.
Rage writing is when something angers you so much, you grab the writing method closest to you and start creating a story based on the event that you’re pissed at.
It’s good fun, yes, but I find it most fulfilling when I reread what I’ve created and reflected upon the theme later. The reflection makes the ending and details in between very clear and solidifies the theme.
Rage writing is also a great way to make sure you write more frequently, have a healthy outlet for your emotion, and process that anger. I’m not saying you’ll turn out being a better person than you were before or that you should try to write a happy ending to your rage-written story; but I am saying, at least for myself, that this is a satisfactory method of expression and it’s going to feel damn good to publish it in time.
Although I’ve been trying to be active on social media, I haven’t been making blog posts lately mostly due to not being in a right state of mind; by right, I mean balanced enough to write something that’s relative to my mission. So, apologies for the absence, but I see those of you who visit and read older posts. Thank you for the support. You’re a blessing.
I’ll be aiming to get back on track with blog posts, article writing, novel updates and more, but I’ll need some R&R for a bit longer (hoping this persistent exhaustion and the headaches stop). Thanks for understanding.
You are never alone if you remember and believe that you are connected to all things. Trust moments of solitude so you’ll have time to ground yourself and feel that connection. You’ll find who you are there and those who need to strengthen their connection with you shall find you, just as you are searching for them. We just need moments of silence sometimes so we can hear the call or be still in the chaos so we can feel what direction we’re being pulled in.
You are never alone, but when you feel alone, just be still.
There’s a great difference between being alone and lonely. When you wake up, you do realize that you’re never really alone, but the loneliness can creep in at times. Loneliness is actually a perception more than it is a fact. Do we all feel lonely sometimes? Definitely. However, I feel the reason why loneliness is a matter of perception is because this feeling only appears when we experience disconnection.
Even with family and friends around, disconnection occurs when it seems like we’re out of harmony with what’s happening around us. Since a lot of what happens to reality mirrors what’s going on within ourselves, disharmony with reality makes us want to disconnect. I recently experienced this disharmony. The best thing I did for myself is sit down and cry, talk to my spirit guides, create music, draw; in other words, I had to express how I felt about the disharmony. Afterwards, the external reality responded with signs and messages. This also helped me gain clarity on my own internal dialogue that at first seemed so repetitive and directionless. That’s what I mean by reality mirroring what’s going on within. If there is disconnection due to disharmony, all we can do is express that.
To manifest the connection and belongingness we long for in life, our expressions for what we need in life need to be loud and true. Some of us express privately, like myself. Some of us need to express it more publicly. Either way is considered loud and true because the universe listens and responds. Even those who don’t feel that the universe is really listening still NEED to express themselves. Their expression is an action that leads to a reaction. That’s the universe speaking, whether they like it or not. Every action parallels, ripples, echoes, and mirrors what’s already there. If we remember that expressing our needs and desires can guide us in life, no matter how directionless we feel in the moment, results will happen.
Change is the only constant, immutable energy that surrounds us. It’s sentience is still being debated by humanity, but I surely believe that energy is listening. You are not alone. The universe listens and responds.
I ran into this video on TikTok by GaryVee and the message was really neat.
Validation is a very tricky scenario. There are elements of what validation is in my prose poem Earth Magic; where how you grow up and who you’re around influences the way you feel about yourself. When we seek validation, there’s always that great risk of not being grounded; your roots end up being pulled one way and the other then you end up not having any foundation. Being uprooted from any situation can be traumatizing, the precursor to an existential crisis. Unfortunately, the solution we’re introduced to for the pain and uncertainty is seeking more validation even though that may have been what uprooted us in the first place. We depend on external sources to confirm or deny who we are and simultaneously mistrust our internal sources, our intuition, our self-esteem, our ability to self-reflect.
Internal and external conflict is such a powerful tool in writing because it’s so human. An inner monologue could contrast what other events are happening around the character, which brings suspense and tension. We go through this all the time. What’s going on within isn’t in alignment with what’s going on around us. The popular kids Garyvee talked about may have not aligned with the pressure that comes with popularity, but they would ignore or repress what’s going on internally to continue being fed the validation externally. Validation like this can be very problematic psychologically, but there’s another side to validation that is much more fulfilling.
Many people think inner peace is a façade because it appears to be near impossible. So why even try to achieve it? I think inner peace at its core is an acceptance of the internal and external tensions along with an acceptance of what can and can’t be controlled. Validation from others is something that you feed. If you want validation from your parents, you’ll feed it by doing whatever they tell you to do or what you think they’d expect from you. If you want validation from peers and coworkers, you will change your behavior or even hide your true behavior. The energy put into feeding the influence validation has on you can be shifted to validation of the self that eventually finds the external sources that are in alignment with who you are. This can happen with even small things, like personal interests; I don’t like mainstream pop music, but if I want validation from peers who like mainstream pop, I’ll listen to it until my ears bleed. The truth is, I like rock and heavy metal. The peers who like mainstream pop may no longer be in alignment with me because of my interests, but now they know who I am and they’ll either want to understand me more or distance themselves. Either way, I now have the opportunity to connect with fellow metal heads and we can now garner a reciprocal validation, but even if validation from the metal heads doesn’t happen, my love for metal will be enough for me. I accept I can’t control my peers or other metal heads; I can control what I listen to and can chose to enjoy it as much as I want.
Validation has a close association with “liking” or “loving” something or someone. That’s why I think it’s a tricky concept that is best simplified when you focus on self-acceptance first and go from there. That way, you’ll never be in poverty even if “likes” become an actual currency. This is what “grounding” really is.
There’s a Black Mirror episode about this. It’s called “Nosedive”, season three, episode one. Please watch it. It’s perfect.
This isn’t going to be a long post, but I wanted to express something.
I think it’s really interesting that any god or spirit who decided to ignore the norm and sculpt their own destiny is considered a “trickster”. The benevolent, selfless spirits are more respected than the intelligent tricksters because they’re considered selfish, but I think selflessness has been coated as negligence of one’s self-worth for far too long. And to defend the trickster, I think self-preservation should be praised more. Tricksters help those who get taken for granted with their stories of losing and winning. Tricksters teach us to be resourceful while considering our strengths and weaknesses. There are heroes who have a moral code that pushes them to be persistent, but the trickster is just as persistent and fully aware that they can turn the direction of their moral compass however they please to prevent being trapped.
Tricksters are the epitome of versatility and freedom. They live as they wish to; why are they shamed for that? I’m not saying all of them are role models, but when it comes to acknowledging one’s inner strength, we should look to them for advice, while other gods may ask us to pray to them and suffer in silence.