Close your eyes.Fall. Let her catch you; if she doesn’t, know that there’s no intention to break your trust, but unconsciously keep a better promise through a deep dive into your psyche.
Close your eyes. Listen. Even when your eyes are open, you can feel her screaming in your most vulnerable places; your gut and your heart. Relentlessly, she struggles against your consciousness that is almost convinced to ignore her and instead let outside forces have the final say.
I just published a prose poem on the fire element. Please read.
Fire introduced himself as the fuel for survival and a slow killer. I thought thinking of his slow burns made my teeth chatter not realizing the cold surrounding was the chill of fear. I admired his trickster ways and wanted to learn from him, while I hid in the cold without knowing why.
When we met, I learned he and I were bipolar. The closer you get, the more you realize our true power. That scares people. Hell, it scared me. I was so afraid, I feared everything I touched when he proudly burned inside me, the purification singeing away the conditioning that convinced me he wasn’t safe. I wasn’t sure if this conditioning was my fault or if my psyche was programmed to never know the word “bravery”, but only saw its definition when he burned brightly in other souls and I obeyed my conditioning to see him as a sin I should never touch.
I needed to share a part of my prose poem “Prose of The Fool” again because… well, remember my earlier post saying that I’m bad at taking my own advice? Yeah. I needed to reread this because I am embarking in something kind of new to me and I’m terrified, but I must trust.
“When new experiences appear, we have the tendency to flood ourselves with expectations of the best, the worst, the fantastic, the horrific, but overall we’re hoping it all leads to a pragmatic ending: let me fall and land on my feet. Right now, you’re flooded with emotions and thoughts trying to keep your head above the high tide of your own soul. Ironically, you fear drowning before you’ve taken your step. Who knows what’s beyond that cliff. An ocean? A puddle? Land? You’ll never know as long as your foot hovers. To move to the new, you must trust.”