I Just Want Poetry – [Just Me]

I think I just want to drown in poetry for my next creative project. I don’t know about you, dear readers, but November has been transformative for me. I’ve been chaotic and melancholy with mild intervals of maturity due to retrospective divination sessions and meditations. And my Thanksgiving was…I suppose 60% okay. I observe the National Day of Mourning protest of the Native American tribes each year out of respect for the history behind this day.

Please donate to the Navajo and Hopi COVID19 Relief Fund.

I took time to read some Native American literature too. Wendy Rose’s powerful words got to me.

And with that poem and her statement about how poetry helped her, I was reminded I’ve why I’ve been writing poetry since the 5th grade. My heart is stirring many things right now, mostly because of old and new pains. Poetry is the best medicine for me right now.

Also, thank you to those who have reacted, shared, and commented on my excerpt of “Lightning Strike”. I’m sincerely grateful for your support.

Be well.


Stream my cover of “Love’s A Burden”


A Remarkable Read – Feminize Your Canon: Alice Dunbar-Nelson – [Artist Recognition / History Study]

“Oft have I thrilled at deeds of high emprise, / And yearned to venture into realms unknown,” Alice Moore Dunbar-Nelson – “To Madame Curie” A powerful force from history greeted me today through The Paris Review: Alice Dunbar-Nelson. I came across this article by Joanna Scutts while looking for magazines that accepted poetry. I was … Continue reading A Remarkable Read – Feminize Your Canon: Alice Dunbar-Nelson – [Artist Recognition / History Study]

Classical Lofi and Honest Chaos – [Just Me/Video]

First and foremost, I found classical lofi and I love it.

Second, I’ve accepted that my writing and creative career is being accomplished in chaotic baby steps. I make small achievements on a daily basis, I think, but thanks to the mental health issues I have, sometimes I forget that daily progress. There’s a lot about my mind that I’m still learning. What I have learned has completely disrupted every single one of my schedules. NaNoWriMo? Only lasted a few days. Poetry reading? Nearly forgot it existed. Psychology degree? Who cares. Eating healthy? Why?

Yeah. It got that bad and then some. It happens though. Actually, this is what my entire life has always been like and when I look back at how my literal hurricane brain somehow achieved previous goals, I’m impressed and baffled really. When my hurricane brain goes full throttle, I beat myself up about it and that is currently a hard habit to break. I long for structure when it comes to my life goals, even though I am a lover of chaos because it inspires me. I guess I have to accept that there’s a method to my madness now. Even my therapist told me I’m trying to force structure on things that aren’t needed, and my rebuttal was, “Dude, it’s my career though,” and my therapist replied with, “Sounds like you need a partner/help,” which I laugh at because who in their right mind would be able to handle me? I can’t even handle me…I know there are those crazy agents out there who are willing to help artists of all sorts promote themselves and their insanity, but I can’t really imagine anyone like that for myself. That doesn’t mean it can’t happen, but, you know…If it happens, it happens.

So yeah, that’s me currently. I’m going to continue understanding myself, grounding myself, and when another creative project is completed, I’ll let you know.

The most recent completion is finally releasing my cover of “Love’s A Burden” by the metal symphonic band Beyond The Black. It’s a dark electronic wonder and I love it. Many thanks if you listen and subscribe to my YouTube. If you don’t have YouTube in your country, I will upload the video on the website soon. You can find the music on Spotify, Tidal, Apple Music, GooglePlay and other digital music distributors.

Lightning Strike – [Stream of Consciousness Poem]

I romanticized storms all my life, until I saw within myself a lightning strike shattering me. The fractals of my psyche flew out of reach. I felt their razor edges dig into the thinnest barriers of my consciousness, forcing me to scream, laugh, weep, rage, and die repeatedly. Those fractals seized my imagination at the most inconvenient of times and also so conveniently, like when I’m in front of a blank canvas or a blank screen or floating in silence and the agony pours from my fingers or my voice and temporarily, I’m relieved. Perhaps that romanticization lingers, but when I remember that lightning strike, I weep over all I’ve gained and all I’ve lost. It’s an endless confusion, an enchanting chaos; it’s a heartbreaking echo of what I know now as my greatest fear: instantaneous and concentrated instability without escape or hope.

Photo by Frank Cone on Pexels.com

More Poetry

Prose of The High Priestess

Elemental Magic – Fire

I’m Awake Again

A Plea To Death


Love’s A Burden – Cover Song – [Music Video]

My cover of Love’s A Burden. Hope you enjoy and subscribe. Comment what you think below 🙂 Twitter/Instagram/Facebook/Tumblr: Authentikei Available on iTunes/Apple Music, Spotify, Tidal, TikTok, Amazon, GooglePlay, Deezer, Pandora, Twitch and more. Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/0gpepcMMhXEGMh1UEdj9Uk Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/loves-a-burden-single/1538243561?uo=4&app=music&at=1001lry3&ct=dashboard

Oops… [Microblog]

This week has been so stressful and confusing that I forgot to promo the release of my cover song. Well, shit. Lol. Give me a day or two to get things sorted.

Stop With The People Worship – [Just Me]

After such an intense year of repeated exposure of people, either famous or not, and their ugly under bellies, I expected that the people worship craze would decrease. How many Americans voted with the idea that “their saviors” will save a country so they won’t have to take any of the responsibility? How many celebrity personalities are still being defended by their fans when that person should be accountable for their actions? How many of our friends and family have been so emotionally manipulative in our lives that we surrender to it, thinking it’s the norm to have those people and their interactions with us define who we are? How long is this going to go on?

I think this kind of mentality varies between cultures, but overall, let’s stop surrendering the power we have, used to uncover and nurture our true selves, to influences that don’t really know or understand us. Let’s stop believing that our desire to give and support another is equivalent with a permanent contract, where you owe them your life forever.

Some people have the genuine heart to serve, and even they are aware of their dignity, exercising enough self-respect to know what to nurture in their life and what poisons to let go. People worship is one of those poisons. Know yourself and care for yourself so you can care for others in a way that helps you maintain your autonomy. I believe you would love so much in life with abandon if you cultivated this.

Be well.


Psychology Has Inspired Me To Try NaNoWriMo (and I’m really excited) – [Just Me/News]

Hello, My head has been stuck in the books lately and when that happens blog posts seem to gradually fade, haha. Between studying, blogging, and my other music projects, I’m missing my novel and the VPD entries again. So I thought maybe I should take NaNoWriMo seriously and see how far I get. Once Samhain … Continue reading Psychology Has Inspired Me To Try NaNoWriMo (and I’m really excited) – [Just Me/News]

Mercury Retrograde Killed My Perfectionism (Sort of) – Just Me

I didn’t really notice the Mercury in Scorpio retrograde energy until yesterday and I could only express how the energy messed with me in a silly Tumblr post. Yeah, so that happened and the relief from perfectionism just from the academic aspect has bled into the music aspect as well. I’m so freaking close to … Continue reading Mercury Retrograde Killed My Perfectionism (Sort of) – Just Me

Love’s A Burden – Cover Song – [Music Video]

My cover of Love’s A Burden. Hope you enjoy and subscribe.

Comment what you think below 🙂

Twitter/Instagram/Facebook/Tumblr: Authentikei

Available on iTunes/Apple Music, Spotify, Tidal, TikTok, Amazon, GooglePlay, Deezer, Pandora, Twitch and more.

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/0gpepcMMhXEGMh1UEdj9Uk

Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/loves-a-burden-single/1538243561?uo=4&app=music&at=1001lry3&ct=dashboard

How’s NaNoWriMo Going? – [Just Me]

To be honest, I think it’s hilarious that I picked the most stressful November (for the Americans anyway) to give this challenge a go for the first time. My experience has been a juggle between caring for my mental health and simply enjoying the writing process. Distractions and interruptions have been abundant and when my mind gets too exhausted from pushing them away, all it wants to do is escape with a video game or book because my mind is too tired to plot a story. I’m having to be incredibly patient and constantly remind myself how important this is to me.

The progress I’ve made so far is significant. I won’t give up.

Comment below and tell me how your experience is going if you’re taking on the challenge and if you’re a fellow writer who isn’t writing a novel, do you have any tips to ward off stress during a writing session? I would love some pointers. (Yes, I’ve already tried take a break from or delete social media.)

Be well.

How To Ignore People – [Video]

“How To Ignore People” is a video by YouTube Channel Philosophers of Life I came across today. I wanted to share because we need to be more considerate of who we allow to have influence in our life. Depending on how those people are, they encourage or discourage your sense of self-worth and affect your confidence. According to the video, it’s a fact that your probability of success is dependent on the people you hang around. If you have people in your life who aren’t healthy for you and you need some advice on how to distance yourself from them, this video has some solid pointers.


More Advice

Letting Go Hold On

How Empaths and Hypersensitives Can Prevent Mental Breakdowns

Do Empaths and Narcissists Attract What They Lack?

Do We Live In A Sick Society?


I’m Awake Again – [Poetry]

High standards bent my neck, forcing me to look at false mirrors; a blink is all it took. Then with closed my eyes, I breathed so deep my neck relaxed, insecurities fell asleep. I’m awake again.

Embracing Your Weird And Respecting You Art – The Creative Introvert Podcast

“The reason Harvey is so relevant I feel, is because I’m interested in the sense that many creative introverts I know have, which is that we’re somehow on the outside, that we don’t fit in, that we’re not approved of by society, that we’re somehow doing “it” wrong (whatever it is.) Just that sense of … Continue reading Embracing Your Weird And Respecting You Art – The Creative Introvert Podcast

Ghost – [Poetry]

You don’t know this about me, you flirting, busy bee, but I’m hurt by the ghost you’ve become. Haunted for years by shallowness, not that you are, but I’m so distressed by the ephemeral fading you’ve done in my life as a picture, out as a memory. Back in again, posing so charmingly, far from … Continue reading Ghost – [Poetry]